Social Bullying (How we deal with it? )

Bullying is an old school topic before the birth of  twitter, facebook and other such  related social media.Social Media has a good reputation but as the time goes by some people misuses it. In the beginning,  I believe its not so bad because you can connect with your long lost friends, classmate and even relatives that living in the other sides of the world without so much cost. Exchanging news or whats going on in your life( And because of that I even register a FB account to all my kids) I may sounds naive but I did because I feel nothing is wrong with communicating with their classmate or friends; of course with my supervision and educate them the Do’s &  Don’t (unaware of what lies in the future).For how many years now nothing serious happen and everything were fine until recently someone in twitter bully her(My balerina daughter).
(Above is the screenshot of the fake account used to bully my daughter, I cover the inappropriate words use)

I cant fathom what I read because all post were below the belt and rude for 14 years old girl.  She dont even have her first love or boyfriend experience then here it comes… post to twitter in public,  destroying and humiliating her verbally and emotionally.  At first my husband and I were furious about it and I nearly loose temper.In my head…  if I will find out who is she/he,  I will just grab  and beat him/her scarily(good thing Im still in control & we dont know who did it).

We communicate with our school and inform the Headmaster about it( in view of  the conversation it looks like from within) They investigated it but it goes nowhere.  I tried to report it in twitter help section but no success since it required the account name which already deleted. Its history!

We learned from this experience. We realized that Family communication is very important to tackle this kind of topic or situation.  We (Husband and I)are fortunate to established or able to build that kind of communication and relationship with our kids. My daughter,  in spite of the hurt and embarrassment, she handles it well.  Her spirit is strong enough to overcome this crazy stuff.Some signs manifested if you know your kids very well.

Here is the signs we noticed:
1.  She’s a happy kid, she suddenly become quiet.
2.  She’s irritable when ask of something.
3.  Usually she sleep in her room; if she  ask, if she can sleep with us in our room (that’s a red lights; it means she’s in trouble or something bother her)

We waiting for her to open up but before it happens, a friend of mine send me the above screenshot and it really furious us. Then we immediately called our daughter  and went to school.  She shows disinterested behavior at first, maybe because she dont want us to act rash assumption of the situation. We set aside our upsetting emotions because we care for her more (how she feels) than those  fallacious news that spread in the school.  We asked her how she is?  Then she vulnerable hug us and said nothing(I  believe she needs us more in that moment).  I was surprised, as her parents on that moment we did nothing except saying comforting words(when earlier of the news we are so furious)

Here are some comforting words we told her:
1.  The people and friends knows you won’t believe those kind of  hearsay.
2.  You know who you are and dont give in that kind of rude attention.
3.  Envious people usually used harsh words to depict  someone opposite of them   because they can never be good as you.
4.  Ignore it and show them that your not affected of their rudeness, eventually it will die and nobody cares anymore.
5.  Handle it with open mind but don’t back down.
6.  Explanations is only for guilty ones.
7.  Go to school the next day in spite of the situation;show them your not afraid and you are strong.
8.  To win in a battle from your secret enemy is to ignore them.
9.  Don’t be ashame of yourself because you did nothing wrong, they should be ashame of themselves because they did that to you.
10.  We love you and no matter what happen, we always here for you as one.

I think those comforting words and not acting rash on the situation really help her to handle it well.  I think its very important for her how we feel.  Showing that we are not affected of the hearsay gave her more confidence as a person. The next day when we talked about it and told her how we follow up in school, she shows no more fear and shame.  She even suggested that its difficult to find the culprit because the account is deleted.

We are proud of her because shes very strong now and more matured.  Good job Snowflake(our pet~name for her)We wish all our children will  over come all the difficulties they encounter in the future and I hope it stop there. Just sharing my sentiments.


||Another Busier Day||

Foto C Acts Manila

This day is another busier day.  Wake up early to prepare for Recital photo shoot.  Its usually half day event. My daughter new pointe shoes was accidentally ripped off  by her co-ballerina in one of their show called ‘Pasinaya'(its a kind of festival for  dance/art which different company or school participate for their specialize pieces in arts and dance).  To make it short I have to buy a new one on that day. While my husband and daughter ate their lunch in a restaurant, Im sewing the point shoes and racing with time because call time is 1:30 local time.  The shop open at 11AM plus the fitting and so on, (Time presure) so imagine my haggard face sewing while the rest of my family happily eating lunch.  Dont get me wrong, it’s not a complain but a declaration 😜


The good thing is the joy of watching our daughter posing in front of the photographer.  That kind of feeling of so much proud because she can do it alone without coaching her anymore.  When she was young I have to coaches,  demonstrate and advice her what to do plus her mood swing that she barely handle.  She smile often, control and handle her emotions on that pressure moments.  She puts make up and tied her hair on her own(she’s much better than me now doing those things) She makes us proud in simple things like that and took the opportunity to catch that very moment.

Foto C Acts Manila

She’s in between a little girl and a little lady,  A teeners that confuse at time and rebel on her own way.  But its OK,  she have to develop her personalities and bring out her best self to spread her wings and fly high as it can be to reach the focal of her goals and dreams.


My busier day ends here!

Continue reading “||Another Busier Day||”

Reminiscing(Asian Grand Prix HK)


A milestone of my ballerina daughter that I want to reminisce in the future. It was this day when I embrace and convince that she have potential in dancing ballet. She started ballet at six years old. At first I thought its just a hobby(ballet is part of school club) until she decided to continue even after school vacation. Her teacher in ballet Ms.Chelo Gemina convinced me to let her continue and told me that she’s gifted. I don’t believe it and I thought she just want to praise her to gain more dancers (my bad). And as years passing by, her teacher advice me to transfer her to main ballet studio to rehearse (school ballet club get boring as she dance with beginners ) which is 30-45 minutes driving from my house(depends on traffic). It’s  an after school rehearsal that will last 2-5 hours. Academic class dismissal is around 3:30pm local time, 5 minutes going home then rest. At 4:30pm we leave the house going straight to her ballet class up to 9pm in the evening. I hate waiting but I don’t have choice but embrace it for the sake of my daughter. There was this moment when I got angry and shouted at her because she’s not consistent in the 9pm dismissal(I blamed her just to release the feeling of being annoyed on waiting and make her feel guilty about it)I’m so immature that time.  She patiently listens when I nagged and just seat at the back of the car in spite of her being tired. That was then….we overcome all sorts of sacrifices, love and hate relationship as mother and daughter.  She turns eleven! 2013 is the year that gave her opportunity to join the Asian Grand Prix Hong Kong.


Her teacher told us that she can compete. I had second thought not only of her skills (I thought she’s too young for International competition) and financially we (my husband and I)cant afford it. But God is so good!


C foto to Lormaigne
To make it short, religiously and diligently after so many practices she made it to the competition(on the event she practice her piece in the lobby of our hotel because her category don’t have slot to rehearse in the studio).  She’s in Junior A Solo category. When her number called I was so nervous. When the music played,I was stun watching her like an angel in her light blue dress. She’s like a naughty cupid that keep turning and turning until the music stop. After successfully dance her piece, we waited for the result(the organizer post the result later that day) Time is long but waiting is over and she made it to final. I’m already happy for her and I thought its enough even if she don’t win for final(to be a finalist is  bonus because it’s her first competition abroad and her skills still lack; that was I thought). There was typhoon and I thought the Final competition will be cancel but God is good it didn’t,  time delayed  but show must go on. I feel the time stop when they call again her number. I’m totally nervous while her teacher beside me pinching my arms out of nervousness. She dances and dances and you can see on her face that she enjoys dancing that moment than her previous one before finals. Her teacher and I praying she wont loose the momentum and Hurray! She dance gracefully and beautiful. I heard the crowd loudly clapping and shouting how pleasant they feel on her performance. That was the moment I was really proud of her and small tears in my eyes (I hate crying in front of the people; very seldom people see me crying)

Cupid variation



After the performance and tabulation, results were out and they calling the winners. On her category they started with fifth winner and so on until the three major winner.” Bronze winner goes to Number JA19 Lormaigne Hannelore Bockmühl “. I can’t express the feelings and all I can say “Thanks God”. I never expected it! Then she was called again for SoDanca Award. Another bonus!!!!


My point of view about my ballerina daughter change in that exact moment. Realization struck me that I have to support her fully in that field she choose. I’m her mother for that simple reason because I’m her tools to achieve what she needs to achieve in the future. To reach for her dreams, to fulfill her destiny, to aspire and inspire her generation.


And most of all to be her friend and number one fan. To guide and to push her abilities to the best that she can achieve without so much pitfalls. In the future I read again this blog to remind me how blessed we are to have a gifted daughter and hopefully she achieve her dreams and be successful in it and this is history.


My Idea of Happiness 👪

I am driving on the way home when  my tears fall on my face. I was upset earlier due to an argument (preferred not to tell who). Im asking myself if Im doing a good job as mom? My husband(his pretty amazing)console me that never ever question myself being a mom because its the toughest job in the world and no one can only fit that job except a mother(what he always said when im upset or delve into  mood swing) Then I looked back on myself and counted what I’m doing everyday and what I did in the past that brought me here; in this position where I am now.